bad start for camp..

havent been blogging for days.. im now down with fever, flu, sore throat and cough. doc even suspect lungcancer! shitty.. scare me only.. haiii.. really wonder how m i going to pass through the 3nights camp starting frm tml..
was reali sick on weekends. but bcoz of snco, i still went for the course days on sat n sun.. tt last frm morning till evening.. didnt get to see doc.. who can understd how i feel.. how much i've sacrifice.. haiiii
the nights were terrible.. all i felt was lk a walking zombie.. breathless, restless, moodless.. feeling cold outside, hot inside.. flip flop flap on the bed zillion times couldnt get myself into dreams.. failed my counting of sheeps as well.. waking up.. falling down.. until the sky is bright and i got myself up for tt day's st john activity. haiii.. a sj slave..
sat was the first day and had opening parade @ the end.. i was the parade orderly once again.. things were ok for me.. endured through jus to get the parade done.. running 38.3degrees..
sun was trainer enhancement day.. yes.. as it goes.. for trainers only.. haiii.. running 38.6degrees.. but still.. live through..
camp starting tml but im so reluctant to go.. this yr got no mdm wenmei, xiao ting, da ting, chuiyee, no sir ben, chong boon, philip, no chiying, no angela... haiiii.. missed my last yr's frens loads!
this yr is so by-the-book.. fussy.. picky.. even trainers are hostile to trainers.. hello.. we're volunteers ok!.. worse of all.. we hav trainers appraisal.. meaning our superior gets to grade us.. and tt shall determine if we can go for next yr's officer course.. wad crappy business is this.. volunteers get graded.. as if i care abt my rank.
the only gd thing is tt everything is brought up during meetings to discuss.. (sarcastically) even tiny things like hairnet (to wear or not to wear) they also hav a discussion abt it.. haha! i was havin a grt laugh though. the whole camp is lack of a very important element.. that is 'ren qing wei'.. in english means.. human to human kind of relationship.. they hav no love.. no care n concern.. no sharing.. that's wad i felt.
wadeva it is.. shall nt disclose much jus in case any trainees gt to read this.. opps.. haha.
im reminded of the goals tt i've set. must achieve!
breathee......
badminton on mondae? yea. hopefully by then i've recover! =)
till then. seeya!