Thursday, November 23, 2006

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME! 22/11/99

yea. todae its da 7th anniversary! see how time flies.
ive been scarred for 7yrs.. and many more to come
being in a half-coma condition for 5days in kk hospital perhaps really dull my brain and slow me down.. hahaa this is a conclusion i came to when my jc mates pointed out that im.. wols.

thinking back, ugh! walking down da aisles.. hearing da sound of an activating saw.. looking at da pure white sparkling operation theatre (i thot i was in heaven).. da piercing of needles thru my veins.. da fear of a really digusting scar.. da fact dat doctors woke me up halfway thru da operation.. and they sliced me at 2areas n not one.. all these still traumatise me even till now.

even so. life moves on and 7yrs later. im alive. perhaps perhaps if i didnt agree to it 7yrs ago.. i may be lying on da bed, thinking of death now.
even so, now im thinkin if only i havent been for the op, maybe i dun hav to live with da scar? yah right, da protruding part will still be thr. unless i saw my ribs..

hahaa. god put me thru this. and ive to cont living with it. if only da society can be more liberal, or rather, my parents' thinking, i would feel better.

and still, every today of da year, i would sincerely like to thank all my aunts uncles cousins, who visited n looked after me when i was in da hospital n at home. w/o all da care concern n love, i wouldnt have made it thru. as a young primary6 kid then, u guys made me realised how fortunate i am to have this big family.

what's right or wrong

it felt so real. for the first time after so long. the signs were real, the feelings were real. the kisses were real. was it the right thing...