Thursday, August 23, 2007

serial

hall activities are so full that im having problems managing my time!! so its pretty true that you might not be able to study well if u stay in hostel. but of course, without hall stay, it feels like u've missed out something in uni life. im sure i'll miss it when im out of sheares.
so ibg has started! and apparently, i didnt do good for badminton. ugh. i was praying for alison, junlong, kenneth, ziyang (my coaches) to be with me. hahaa. but well, lost one. won one. i did my best. i hate to be defeated. that's why i prefer to play sports for leisure, and not competition. on the other hand, every match helps me to grow in a way. the experience. the chance. are a lesson learnt, with a big scar on me. of course, without the support and encouragement by my hall mates and seniors, i wouldnt even dare to step out into the court again. and, im touched when u guys shouted the "leeling u chiobu u look like woo!" cheer! LOL. haaa. =D
this is the highlight! sheares hall is having a formal dinner tomorrow night! this is the one where the freshmen have to find a senior (of yr opposite sex) to be your partner for the evening! omg. this is damn embarrassing. we have to practically went up to the guys' room and asked them individually. and well, i started with "hey! are u free on the 23rd?" "can you go with me for the dinner?" hahaa! i felt like shit! have never done it before. but well, after doing so, its not so tough after all. hahaa! we're told to prepare a gift for our partner too! so hmm. i guess mine is quite presentable larh. i put effort in it at least. hahaa. well, the best part is, tomorrow before 6, we'll have to dress properly, and knock on our partner's room, to ask them to go to the mpsh (multi purpose sports hall - where the dinner is held) with us!! o gosh!! honestly, i dont feel good! ahh!! this is going (quite) against my rule. i hate to be forced to do things! ahh. and like wad hweechin said (she knows me well!) "you're the kind that needs to be on the steering wheel all the time!". well, absolutely!! whenever im off, i feel WEIRD! and i loathe this feeling. and chin continued to say "that's a man characteristic!" oh god. hahaa!! im damn not ladylike ah! hahaa. gotta be more demure tomorrow!
games day is coming. and once again, it gave me insomnia. lost appetite. i dont wana feel this way. but pls people. u know wad. only until today, im informed that, only 4 members of my committee will reach tpss on time on sat. haii. how do u expect the event to work? im seriously thinking that i'll flop this whole damn event. but somewhat. i can't choose to dig a hole and hide in it! i guarantee that many hiccups will arise on that day itself. haii. i really hope to leave st john with gd memories. but it doesnt seem to be possible now. maybe, i really should have left st john even earlier. a mistake made. whatever it is. saturday is my last day in st john. people, bless me pls. let me leave with tears of joy. and not tears of sadness.
thanks.
i really need to sleep now.

what's right or wrong

it felt so real. for the first time after so long. the signs were real, the feelings were real. the kisses were real. was it the right thing...