i dont want

where have my confidence went ?
i was full of them when i was still in sj
but when uni starts
it became alien to me.

it wasnt a one day thing
it was a process of self examining and coming to realisation
and proof.. to the bottom i went.

thats when i first hurt so much
thats when i first cry so much
thats when i fall and allow people to help me up
first time having so much emotional display.

i need to get my confidence back
cos you dont need to be at the clouds
but at least be at the top of the trees.

thanks tzl. u encouraged me on this before.
and i want it so badly now.


tat someone else. i know i'll never be.